such is life, such are the odds and such are the individual destinies of us all. in the past 7 years, i have known 10 couples to divorce and 10 people that have died (in middle age or earlier). we all know that these things happen in life – and early on in life, we see these things happening from afar. but as you get older, as you hit the 40’s, 50’s – it comes crashing closer and closer to home. on the death front, you wonder why they went so early in life and you hold your dear ones closer – praying that you are not next and being more grateful for what you have in life – so stop complaining – you are not dead yet. on the divorce front – it is an even bigger shock sometimes. you see that perfect couple and divorce never even crosses your mind. but then one day you see the wife shoveling the snow or the husband not showing up at social events – and the signals start to mount. it is a shock to think that they went through all those years together, having kids, raising kids, building careers together, going through tough times – and then one day they quit the relationship – they fall out of love almost as quick as when they fell into it. this cannot be explained easily – why did this person wake up one day and say “I’m done”. most likely things were boiling under the surface for years – unknown to other person in the relationship and certainly unknown to the rest of the world. it is a tragedy that will affect many people in their world – especially the kids. and such is one of the big mysteries of life – one day we are happy and one day we are not.